The importance of effective communication between lovers
Do you know that relationships and marriages don’t last easily? They require hard work. Even the most successful couples admit that keeping their love alive isn’t easy. However, if you’re willing to put in the effort, you can build a long-lasting relationship.
In this article, I will provide you with tips that will help you to effectively communicate with your partner.
1) Communicate effectively:
Practice active listening:
This means preparing to listen to hear the message of your partner and not to prepare your defense. Find a time and place where you can be without distractions and focus only on what your partner is saying. Try to set aside your negative perceptions about his or her actions or motives so you can focus on the conversation in real time. Take into account the nonverbal signs as well as what is said out loud.
Use “I” statements
Communication is not about blame, it is about responsibility. “I” statements start with how you are feeling about the behavior or action of your partner. It means you take ownership of your feelings and also suggest a way to improve the behavior. However, you” statements frequently blame the other person. Avoid making these kinds of statements. They may sound like “You are always making big purchases without asking me first!”
An example of an “I” statement may be “I feel confused when you make big purchases without me because I thought we agreed to go together. From now on, I would like to be included in these purchases.”
Use a soft, warm tone when speaking
Your relationship should be based on mutual respect and love. A soft voice reflects the love, compassion and understanding that is missing from yelling. Meet your partner’s eyes and speak from a place of love and understanding. If affectionate names are commonly used in your relationship, you can use such names to show that you still care for your partner even during a disagreement. Saying things like “What do you think, dear?” or “I’m sorry I disappointed you, baby. How can I make things right?” may help to ease the tension.
Save harsh words, even during arguments. You can’t take back what’s been said. When you say something hurtful to your partner you send the message that a disagreement is equivalent to a war. You are on the same side. Remember that. To prevent saying nasty things and getting caught up in anger, many couples use a “24 hour” rule. In this scenario, the couple calm down and try to discuss things after one day.
2) Resolve conflicts and crisis:
Discuss issues upfront instead of letting them grow in size
It is a relationship myth that a solid relationship does not require work. Be prepared to put the work in. You can accomplish this by addressing any problems with your partner before they rear to their ugly heads. Make a commitment to hold a weekly check-in in which either of you can bring up any issues you have on your chest. Communicating problems with the idea of tackling them as soon as they come up helps you establish a strong foundation.
Work through problems as a team
Relationships are about the “we” and not the “I” or “you”. Focus on honest communication to work through problems together with room for each of you to give and take. Learn from one another instead of working against one another.
For example, if you need a sum of money to pay for a big purchase, you can sit down and find ways for both of you to contribute. Each of you can put money into savings for a span of time, or cut back on non-essential expenses.
Using terms like “we” as in “We will get through this” or “us” as in “Let us figure out a solution together” help foster a teamwork approach.
Every relationship comes with ups and downs. When you encounter an issue, go through it logically and objectively and make a decision based on a mutual well-being of both partners.
Be willing to compromise
Compromising may include writing out a pros and cons list to points of disagreement and talking through the list objectively. Talking aloud may clearly point out which choice is mutually beneficial. It also means finding a way that both of you can have your needs met without jeopardizing the needs of the other.
Another way you can compromise is doing things one person’s way one time and then favoring the other person’s opinion the next time. For example, you may watch one person’s favorite movie one night and the other person’s top pick the next night.
Make your values and needs known to your partner
Be sure to clearly define what you need from a partner and what you intend to give to your partner. Follow through on your obligations to your partner and speak up when he or she isn’t doing the same in a constructive manner.
It is a myth that you do not need to tell your partner what you value and need. You are mistaken to think that simply because your partner loves you, he or she should know what you need. Mind reading is impossible and the expectation of it merely hinders your growth. So, try to communicate your desires simply by saying something to the effect of “Charity is really important to me. What can we do to honor that moving forward?”
In sum, all is about communication! If you want to have a lasting relationship, just try to improve your communication skills by following the tips mentioned above.
I end up my article with this quotation by Miranda Kerr:
I think for any relationship to be successful, there needs to be loving communication, appreciation, and understanding.
Thank you for sharing this with your friends. Anything you need to know? Leave us a comment and we will do our best to provide you with all tips
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